How to Strive to Have a Godly Marriage - How to Build a Strom Proof Marriage

How to Build a Storm Proof Marriage
(How to Strive to Have a Godly Marriage series)

Proverbs 14:1 - Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.

We are either building up or plucking down our relationships, our marriage. If you want to build up your marriage, you have to have Jesus in your relationship and do what He says, and He will heal you, He will strengthen you and He will give you wisdom, He will restore you, and build your marriage.

Proverbs 24:3-4 - Through wisdom is an house builded; and by understanding it is established: And by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches.

Luke 6:47 - Whosoever cometh to me, and heareth my sayings, and doeth them, I will shew you to whom he is like: Founded upon Christ, our marriage must be built on Christ, God established the marriage covenant.

Matthew 7:25 - And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.


Genesis 2:24 - Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
If your marriage is founded on Christ, then nothing, not family, finances, differences, nothing, can destroy it. Marriage is a covenant with God and ordained by God, if your marriage isn’t built on the firm foundation of Christ it is on rocky soil and has a good probability of not lasting. (Matthew 7:26-27 “And every one that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man, which built his house upon the sand: And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it.”). Did you know some animals have only one mate for life? Dove, the Bald Eagle, Wolves, and Red Fox are just a few. Marriage is between one man and one woman, and God.

Proverbs 2:17 - Which forsaketh the guide of her youth, and forgetteth the covenant of her God.

Malachi 2:14 - Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant.

Some people view marriage as just a slip of paper between two people living together, or as a contract, but it’s not, it’s not a contract, it is a covenant made with God between a man and a woman.

I Peter 1:13 - Wherefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and hope to the end for the grace that is to be brought unto you at the revelation of Jesus Christ;

Philippians 2:5 - Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus: we must be humble toward one another and our minds should always be in Christ; marriage is until death do you part.

Proverbs 16:18 - Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.

Pride comes with and is always involved in strife and conflict. We should be building our marriage on humility; a happy, Godly marriage will consist of two people who humble themselves before one another.

I John 1:9 - If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

When we are humble, and we apologize to our spouse for wrong doings, sooner or later they will forgive us; most importantly though we should have a forgiving heart like Christ, because Christ forgave us while we were yet sinners, (Romans 5:8), dyeing on the cross for our very sins, what right do we have to hold a grudge and not forgive our spouse?

Here are four foundations to build your Godly marriage on -

1. Communication – you can’t have a Godly marriage, or even a good marriage, without communication. When men communicate with their wives they are basically telling their wives that she is trustworthy.

2. Unconditional love – agape love; meaning, you love your spouse no matter what, with no strings attached.

John 3:16 - For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

Ephesians 5:25 - Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

3. Acceptance and Praise – leave all anger and put-downs out in the street, this is your spouse, you choose to marry him/her. Praise your spouse every day, even over the small, simple things, {Tell them they are a good parent; praise their spiritual walk; surprise them with a massage}, build them up rather than tear them down.

Husbands, you can make your wife feel like a queen when you treat her like one. God says to treat her like a lady {open doors for her, write her a love note, call her during the day}; build your home on Jesus.

4. Changes, not stubbornness – You can change YOU; not your spouse. But, if you will submit to God and yield to Him, He will change your spouse, in His time, His way. You can do all things through Christ (Philippians 4:13) and with God, all things are possible. You work with God on changing you, and support your spouse when they begin making changes.

II Corinthians 12:9 - And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

Luke 1:37 - For with God nothing shall be impossible.

Build your marriage on salvation, not just religion. If you’re both walking with Christ you can build a fortress on Christ, the solid Rock, building your marriage on the solid Foundation.

Video Portion, continued from the message titled “The Power of Submission”

10 Steps to Victory over Lust

1. Know and understand that lust is a terror, not a toy

Matthew 5:29 - And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

Proverbs 9:17-18 - Stolen waters are sweet, and bread eaten in secret is pleasant. But he knoweth not that the dead are there; and that her guests are in the depths of hell.

Proverbs 5:3-4 - For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil: But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a twoedged sword.

Proverbs 20:17 - Bread of deceit is sweet to a man; but afterwards his mouth shall be filled with gravel. Avoid the deceitfulness of the sweetness.

2. Make an immediate brake from lust with prayer and fasting; breaking urges and dedicating your body to God.


I Corinthians 10:7-8 - Neither be ye idolaters, as were some of them; as it is written, The people sat down to eat and drink, and rose up to play. Neither let us commit fornication, as some of them committed, and fell in one day three and twenty thousand.
Mark 9:29 - And he said unto them, This kind can come forth by nothing, but by prayer and fasting.

Romans 12:1 - Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer;

I Corinthians 7:5 - Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.

The longer you fast and pray, the more the bad desires will go away. Don’t forget to fill them with something good, something uplifting to God.

3. RUN from lust

II Timothy 2:22 - Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

Job 31:1 - I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid?

Proverbs 6:25 - Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; neither let her take thee with her eyelids.

Flee temptation, remove everything that connects you to lust – T.V., internet, movies, get rid of e them if they are a temptation for you. We cannot live like the world and expect not to fall into worldly lusts and sins.

4. Stay busy, but be careful with what and how you stay busy.

Genesis 1:2 - And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.

Genesis 3:18-19 - Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field; In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.

God wants us to stay busy, need something productive to do? Ask God what you can do for His Kingdom, He will gladly give you something to do.

Lamentations 3:27 - It is good for a man that he bear the yoke in his youth.

Don’t let your teenage boys sit around, this is so very dangerous. Young men need a lot of work; busy men are moral men, stay busy.

I Corinthians 7:2 - Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.

Be careful about how often you are a part from your spouse, like going out of town alone, etc. Make your relaxation place a safe place, free of T.V. and internet. The Bible says to flee temptation, right then; when you run across or see something that is a temptation that will cause you to sin, RUN the opposite direction from it.

5. Stand clearly for purity by rejecting lust in those around you. Lust is not a toy with which you play with. Avoid being around people telling inappropriate jokes and stories.

Ephesians 5:11 - And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.


When evil rises up, you will either approve it or reprove it … you may ask, if I don’t tell the joke or story, I’m not approving of it ….WRONG ….. if you don’t reprove it, you are approving it.

5. Speak up! Don’t just sit there and listen to lude talk or sit there and not say anything if you see lustful pictures. Choose purity, say NO. When you agree to watch something evil, you are not only responsible for your lust, but also the lust of others watching it, and others that are affected by your lust.

6. Memorize and live by Romans 6:1-6 - What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound? God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein? Know ye not, that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus Christ were baptized into his death? Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life. For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection: Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin

The old, sinful man was destroyed when you accepted Jesus Christ as you Lord and Savior.

7. Pray for pure dreams.

Psalm 51:6 - Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part thou shalt make me to know wisdom.
Psalm 17:3 - Thou hast proved mine heart; thou hast visited me in the night; thou hast tried me, and shalt find nothing; I am purposed that my mouth shall not transgress.

Psalm 119:55 - I have remembered thy name, O LORD, in the night, and have kept thy law.

Every night when you lay down, when you lay your kids down, pray and ask for a hedge of protection around you and their minds.

8. Spend as little time as possible with someone of the opposite gender of yourself, as possible, who isn’t your spouse, and never minister to or counsel someone of the opposite gender alone, never.

Titus 2:3-4 - The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, Husbands – ask your wife, “Is there any woman I am around that causes you to have a warning signal?” and don’t argue with her when she tells you who she is! Just like the ribs protect the heart, God created woman from Adam’s rib, so the wife is the guardian and protector of the husband’s heart.

Women, dress with modesty! God WILL hold you accountable if you carelessly dress for men to look at you or cause a man to sin by looking at you. Mother’s and daughter’s should dress appropriately around dads and brothers and other men/young boys. Daughter’s – allow your dad to approve your clothing, without argument!

9. Build accountably relationships.
Mom’s and daughter’s, son’s and dad’s. Christian friends, Christian family members, someone you can trust to not go tell everyone else your business, and someone you can trust to tell you the truth in God’s Word, and you NOT get upset with them, and someone you can trust enough to go each other any time for prayer and encouragement.
Hebrews 10:24 - And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works:

James 5:16 - Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

Have regular accountability sessions where you can confess your faults and pray together.


Matthew 16:18 - And I say also unto thee, That thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.

10. Decide that you really want to be a spiritual person.

Lustful, sinful desires are to be brought under the control of God, bringing your entire life under God’s control.
Romans 12:21 - Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.

Galatians 5:16 - This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.
Victory begins on your knees before God.

Look under "Godly Marriage" for more ln this series

Challenge – practice running from sin this week – turn off your electronics, T.V, computer, cell phone, table , I Phone, whatever is a hindrance and temptation for you, turn it off and spend that time with God this week

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Jenn