How to Strive to Have a Godly Marriage - Expectations


6 Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage, Draw Closer to God and Help Your Spouse Draw Closer to God -

  1. Expectations ruin relationships; don't argue or disagree openly, around or in front of others
  2. Praise each other openly; have weekly or monthly date night; kiss each other on the cheek, hug each other; hold each other's hand, openly
  3. Write down 5 good things throughout the week about your spouse and share them with your spouse
  4. Do something nice for your spouse daily without expectations of something in return
  5. Read your Bible together, out loud, at least one chapter a night, with the family, then have a q &a session about what you read after.
  6. Pray together, out loud, daily, with your spouse

Expectations

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

6:29 PM

II Kings 4:8-17 - "And it fell on a day, that Elisha passed to Shunem, where was a great woman; and she constrained him to eat bread. And so it was, that as oft as he passed by, he turned in thither to eat bread. And she said unto her husband, Behold now, I perceive that this is an holy man of God, which passeth by us continually. Let us make a little chamber, I pray thee, on the wall; and let us set for him there a bed, and a table, and a stool, and a candlestick: and it shall be, when he cometh to us, that he shall turn in thither. And it fell on a day, that he came thither, and he turned into the chamber, and lay there. And he said to Gehazi his servant, Call this Shunammite. And when he had called her, she stood before him. And he said unto him, Say now unto her, Behold, thou hast been careful for us with all this care; what is to be done for thee? wouldest thou be spoken for to the king, or to the captain of the host? And she answered, I dwell among mine own people. And he said, What then is to be done for her? And Gehazi answered, Verily she hath no child, and her husband is old. And he said, Call her. And when he had called her, she stood in the door. And he said, About this season, according to the time of life, thou shalt embrace a son. And she said, Nay, my lord, thou man of God, do not lie unto thine handmaid. And the woman conceived, and bare a son at that season that Elisha had said unto her, according to the time of life."

The woman in the above Scripture was an outstanding example of a godly woman.

She was grateful.

  1. She had a deep contentment with her life (v.13), she was happy and content with her life and  her husband. She was peaceful, happy, joyful and contented.
    Proverbs 31:16 - "
    She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard."
    Fall in love with your God given position as a dedicated and devoted wife and mother; this is one of your ministries. Be content with the place and position God gives you.
    Philippians 4:11 - "
    Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content."
  2. She had no wrong expectations; (vs. 13,16) she didn't harbor or hope for any wrong expectations. EXPECTATIONS RUIN RELATIONSHIPS AND ….
     

DESTROY FRIENDSHIPS
PRODUCE ANGER AND BITTERNESS
DAMAGE CONTENTMENT
PRODUCE DISAPPOINTMENT

 

Our expectations are usually built on what we think are our rights -

Wrong expectations or 'rights' would be things like

Right to be happy
Right to have godly children
Right to expect godly behavior
Right to a godly marriage


Godly goals and working towards them is good - but, EXPECTATIONS RUIN RELATIONSHIPS

What we perceive as human rights are not rights, but expectations.

Leviticus 19:32 - "Thou shalt rise up before the hoary head, and honour the face of the old man, and fear thy God: I am the LORD"

When our faith and trust are in God, we are content and thankful with little. The woman and her husband gave and didn't expect anything in return.

Luke 6:35 - "But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil."

EXPECTATIONS RUIN RELATIONSHIPS and can damage your spirit of gratefulness.

To have a spirit of gratefulness, give your expectations and your husband over to God, every day, several times a day if necessary. Ask God to give you whatever He wants you to have.

Luke 24:21 - "But we trusted that it had been he which should have redeemed Israel: and beside all this, to day is the third day since these things were done." wrong expectations leave us disappointed, delusional, upset, angry and sad.

Make sure your expectations are reasonable, and are God's. Make sure your expectations for your family are actually their responsibilities under God and not your own expectations.

Don't expect to be - treated right, remembered on your birthday, or remembered on your anniversary.

Real expectations would be -

Expect the one you need to not be there when you need them the most

Expect that death is going to come

Watch out for pride (the "I" factor) - "I did this and deserve praise or mention" or expecting people to follow you, bless you or that God will bless you the way you think He should bless you - those are pride.

When we are in a confrontation and we strike back at someone, it is a portrait of the serpent (satan) in us.

Psalm 22 - "(To the chief Musician upon Aijeleth Shahar, A Psalm of David.) My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? why art thou so far from helping me, and from the words of my roaring? O my God, I cry in the daytime, but thou hearest not; and in the night season, and am not silent. But thou art holy, O thou that inhabitest the praises of Israel. Our fathers trusted in thee: they trusted, and thou didst deliver them. They cried unto thee, and were delivered: they trusted in thee, and were not confounded. But I am a worm, and no man; a reproach of men, and despised of the people. All they that see me laugh me to scorn: they shoot out the lip, they shake the head, saying, He trusted on the LORD that he would deliver him: let him deliver him, seeing he delighted in him. But thou art he that took me out of the womb: thou didst make me hope when I was upon my mother's breasts. I was cast upon thee from the womb: thou art my God from my mother's belly. Be not far from me; for trouble is near; for there is none to help. Many bulls have compassed me: strong bulls of Bashan have beset me round. They gaped upon me with their mouths, as a ravening and a roaring lion. I am poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint: my heart is like wax; it is melted in the midst of my bowels. My strength is dried up like a potsherd; and my tongue cleaveth to my jaws; and thou hast brought me into the dust of death. For dogs have compassed me: the assembly of the wicked have inclosed me: they pierced my hands and my feet. I may tell all my bones: they look and stare upon me. They part my garments among them, and cast lots upon my vesture. But be not thou far from me, O LORD: O my strength, haste thee to help me. Deliver my soul from the sword; my darling from the power of the dog. Save me from the lion's mouth: for thou hast heard me from the horns of the unicorns. I will declare thy name unto my brethren: in the midst of the congregation will I praise thee. Ye that fear the LORD, praise him; all ye the seed of Jacob, glorify him; and fear him, all ye the seed of Israel. For he hath not despised nor abhorred the affliction of the afflicted; neither hath he hid his face from him; but when he cried unto him, he heard. My praise shall be of thee in the great congregation: I will pay my vows before them that fear him. The meek shall eat and be satisfied: they shall praise the LORD that seek him: your heart shall live for ever. All the ends of the world shall remember and turn unto the LORD: and all the kindreds of the nations shall worship before thee. For the kingdom is the LORD'S: and he is the governor among the nations. All they that be fat upon earth shall eat and worship: all they that go down to the dust shall bow before him: and none can keep alive his own soul. A seed shall serve him; it shall be accounted to the Lord for a generation. They shall come, and shall declare his righteousness unto a people that shall be born, that he hath done this."

Jesus is the picture of a worm, He doesn't strike back. A spirit of gratefulness is born out of "I deserve nothing, I am a nobody", humbleness.

II Corinthians 10:12 - "For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise."

Psalm 62:5 - "My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him."

Give your expectations to God

Give your husband/marriage to God

Give your kids to God

6 Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage, Draw Closer to God and Help Your Spouse Draw Closer to God -

  1. Expectations ruin relationships; don't argue or disagree openly, around or in front of others
  2. Praise each other openly; have weekly or monthly date night; kiss each other on the cheek, hug each other; hold each other's hand, openly
  3. Write down 5 good things throughout the week about your spouse and share them with your spouse
  4. Do something nice for your spouse daily without expectations of something in return
  5. Read your Bible together, out loud, at least one chapter a night, with the family, then have a q &a session about what you read after.
  6. Pray together, out loud, daily, with your spouse

Jenn
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